I did it! I did it! It is the day after the Shamrock Half-Marathon and I survived! It wasn't pretty but I crossed the finish line which is all I really wanted in the first place.
So a little history...
The last Half I ran was back in college (maybe 2004ish). Since then I have had 3 foot surgeries, gotten married, and had 2 kids! Before all that, I LOVED running! I am being very clear here... I was never any good at it... I have always been slow but I could run the distance even if it took me a million years to get there. After playing sports my whole life, I got to college and found myself with no team sport to play for the very first time in my life! With a Dad who was a runner, the answer was right there... start running! It was great because it was something that I could do to fulfill that competitive spirit I had (still have). Of course I was never going to win a race. To me is was more about pushing myself. Could I beat my last time or could I pass that one person running right in front of me. Not to mention, in college, it was my escape from everything. I could go out on the road and have piece and quiet and just think.
Then came my very first Half Marathon. I knew I was having a foot problem but ran anyways (yes I am stupid and stubborn). I found myself with stress fractures all over the foot. Then came a car accident which pretty much sealed the deal on a bad foot. Three surgeries later I was told to pretty much forget running and find something different to do. If you are a runner, you know that is hard to do. I tried swimming and hated it with a passion. I became a gym rat and obsessed with the elliptical machine. I would try to run here and there but it never lasted long until my foot would start hurting. My Mom cringed and shook her head every time she heard I was running (yes I tried to keep it from her!) I pretty much gave up on it for a long time...
Then I got married (and pregnant) all on the same day! So almost exactly 9 months later came Hayden. Which also came my desire to start running and get my pre-Hayden body back. I ran sporadically and even ran a few races here and there (nothing more than an 8k). I pretty much stayed true to my gym-rat schedule though and was somewhat satisfied with working out at the gym and the elliptical machine.
Now we are up to Bennett which came a little more than two years after Hayden. So if I thought I needed to run after Hayden, then I thought it was going to take a miracle to get my body back after Boo. I was positive 70+ pounds was not going to come off from just my gym schedule. Not to mention I found it extremely hard to keep a gym schedule with two kids. Who knew right?!?!?! :) Oh and let me state that Boo is NOT a fan of the gym nursery and makes it very difficult for Mommy to get more than a 40minute workout in!
I really wanted to run! Not just for my body but I wanted something that was just mine. Lots of Mommy's can lose themselves in being a Mommy, a Wife, a Caregiver, etc... Healthy Living and Exercising has been a part of me for such a long time and I felt that I was losing that. I have an AMAZING husband but he works hours that pretty much take him out of the equation and leave me to the every day things required to take care of the girls. I found myself skipping the gym more and more and still don't get there as much as I should or want to.
Since Bennett I have run a handful of races. I ran the Shamrock 8k last year when she was only 4 months old. That was a huge accomplishment. It told me that I can really do anything I set my mind to. I signed myself up for the Half Marathon and told myself that I was really going to train so that I could complete my second Half. Well.... life got in the way. And when I say life, I mean my husband shattered his leg in January. This meant I now had another 'child' that pretty much needed me to take care of him. Yes, I could still get to the gym but there was no treadmill training. Anyone else out there despise the treadmill?????? I can run 7 miles on the road and then get on a treadmill and be ready to quit after 2!!!!! I found it really difficult to get any road miles in. It sounds easy to just walk out the door and go run a few miles, but the girls couldn't be left with a Daddy that couldn't get off the couch to make a bottle, or get a cup of juice, or make a snack, or wipe a butt.
I feel like I am making excuses for why my training didn't happen but that is my reality and I am going to do my best to make more time for running in the future.
Soooo... finally I am up to yesterday. (sorry for the long history). I went back and forth whether I should run the race or just defer it to next year. I was already mad at myself for not training for it. I knew I wasn't going to be able to run the entire thing and that just pissed me off. I knew I would hit a wall at about 8 or 9 as that is the most I have been able to run in a very long time. But in the end I knew finishing it was an accomplishment even if I had to walk some so I went ahead with it. My knee had been bothering me just a bit on the few runs that I was able to get in. I bought one of those cheap compression braces just to kind of give my knee a bit of support and hold my kneecap up. Apparently I hadn't trained enough to know that my knee didn't hurt just a bit, it hurt A LOT! At about the 8 mile mark I couldn't ignore the pain anymore and walked almost the entire 8th mile. When I got to the 9th mile marker I told myself I would just run as much as I could but I wasn't going to force anything. All I could think about was already having a husband at home on crutches. If I hurt myself then who was going to take care of the girls!!!!! So from there on I pretty much ran until the pain was about to bring tears and then I would start walking. As soon as I started walking, the sharp pain would disappear and it was just dull. Then once I gave it a break and decided it was time to start running again, the very first step into a jog would bring back the pain. VERY FRUSTRATING! At about the 10th mile, I started seeing those crazy Marathoners going past me (they started an hour after the halfers and these guys were already on their 15th mile when they past me!!!!!) I told myself that I could do this and was determined to RUN across the finish line. At the very end, the course turns onto the boardwalk for the final stretch. I stopped as soon as I go to the boardwalk, stretched my knee, and took a very long deep breath. I really wanted to make it all the way down the boardwalk without having to walk. I ran to the finish line (at some points I was barely moving forward as I did a few hop stretches to try to get my knee not to buckle), but I DID IT! I RAN across the finish line!!!!!
I heard Jesse and Hayden yelling for me and it quickly made me forget about the pain. Hayden was smiling at me and I was proud of myself that I was able to show my little girl that I can do anything I put my mind to.
It is the next day and yes I am sore. Although it is not as bad as I expected to be. (I thought I would have a hard time getting out of bed!) Yes the knee hurts. I'm going to take it easy for a bit to see if it starts to heal or if it is anything more (knock on wood that it's not). After that, I am planning on making it a priority to run. I don't have to make it my life like it once was but I definitely want it a PART of my life. Deep down I have ridiculous dreams of one day being able to run a marathon. But who knows, maybe one day it won't be such a ridiculous dream. I found out yesterday, after watching my Dad cross the Marathon finish line that it was his 28th Marathon!!!!!! That is amazing to me. Am I too old to say that I want to be like my Daddy when I grow up?!?! :)
